Many details about the infected population remain classified: Whether the hotness afflicting them is the result of a contagious dormitory bug; exactly what medical steps are being taken to correct their thermoregulatory disorders; if the condition will prove fatal. It is also unclear exactly how hot the freshmen are. (100°? 105°? Certainly can't tell by looking at them.)
The above photo, captured by Fifteen Minutes, was taken in a Cambridge restaurant apparently transformed into a makeshift quarantine station sometime around the bleak mid-winter holiday known as "Sad Christmas."
Looking at the image from a layman's perspective, there appear to be a number of quick fixes that might alleviate the discomfort caused by the freshmen's miserable hotness: the gentlemen could remove their blazers; the young women could tie their hair up in ponytails to get it off their necks; the student who wore a superfluous scarf to dinner could remove it.
To raise awareness of Harvard's hottest, most abject freshmen, Fifteen Minutes conducted a brief Q&A with each. (Kennedy's favorite book: "Jurassic Park"; Archibald I. H. Stonehill: is named that.) If you are interested in learning more about (and possibly sponsoring one of) the perilously balmy freshmen, click here.
[Image via Fifteen Minutes Magazine]