Have you noticed anything odd going on this morning? Oh yes. Let us be the first to tell you that the time to panic is upon us.
ITEM: The New York City subway system suffered an atrocious commute today, with some trains being inexplicably stranded in stations for long periods of time.
It seems our nation’s centers of powers are facing a mysterious and spreading collapse.
I choose to panic. If you choose to remain calm, good—I’ll get away ahead of you.