Today is a big day for Sarah Palin. She is in Iowa to endorse Donald Trump, which will shore up Trump’s standing with Real Americans and once again give the Palin family a moment in the national spotlight. But things back home aren’t as rosy: Last night, Palin’s son, Track, was charged in Wasilla on domestic violence and weapons charges.
Frankly, the Oregon militia boys are getting kind of boring. The authorities’ decision to avoid engaging with their antics is looking prescient: Without an enemy, the men occupying a federal wildlife reserve have been reduced from rifle-toting badasses to rifle-toting dildo whiners. So where to turn for your anti-federal government kicks now? Enter John Sturgeon, Alaska’s favorite hovercrafting moose hunter.
“Bear! Bear! You’re breaking it! You’re breaking my kayak! Why are you breaking my kayak?! Bear! STOP!”
As a lady it brings me no pleasure to tell you that yesterday while President Barack Obama was doing a little fishing in Dillingham, Alaska at Kanakanak Beach, a big salmon jizzed all over him. Our President: President Barack Obama.
The most patient cops in the world released the audio of their interviews from the drunken Palin family throw down last month, and the racial slurs and crying, drunk Bristol Palin aren't even the weirdest parts.