Chet Hanks, free speech enthusiast and son of Tom Hanks (known for his role as “Dr. Dwayne Twitchell” in Season 10, Episode 5 of Happy Days), has been thinking a lot about this year’s electoral circus. Thoughts which he has kindly boiled down for us in a three-part Instagram video series that begins: “Pshhht, pthhssshttt, PSHHHTTHT.”
"Africa is so beautiful! Everyone MUST visit at least one time in their life!" says Chester "Chet" Hanks "Haze," the rapping 22 year-old scion of an immensely wealthy A-list Hollywood movie star, in his inimitable declarative style. Here he is, pictured above, posing in a typical African dwelling amid local flora and fauna.
Okay, here is the ABSOLUTELY TRUE setup to the jokes which you are about to hear: Chester M. "Chet Haze" Hanks is the Northwestern University-educated son of multimillionaire Oscar-winning Hollywood superstar Tom Hanks. The very definition of a self-made man, in other words. And he's a rapper. Haha. But wait, scratch that—now he's an R&B singer. Haha. I know. Here's his new single. Haha. Stop it, wait, we're getting to the point here. So anyhow, Chet Haze is active on Twitter, for the fans. If you haven't been reading in the past few days, you've missed out, yo:
Northwestern University theater major and former Los Angeles resident Chester "Chet" "Chet Haze" Hanks caused a minor uproar yesterday when he took a brave stand on the Twitter against bullying victims who commit suicide. Alas, thanks to the pussyassness of the world at large, Chet has been forced to apologize.
So then, let's all, in unison, read this thing written on the Twitter yesterday (and then deleted) by Chet Haze, the best rapping son of an Academy Award winner Northwestern University has seen since Peter Fonda drunkenly performed "My Adidas" on the quad in 1986. This could be Chet Haze's most controversial piece of Twitter wisdom since "What's your sex playlist called? Mines called 'we fuckin' LOL I'm serious tho."
Here we are six weeks into 2012, and we've barely even stopped to contemplate all of the knowledge, wisdom, and understanding that pours forth from Northwestern University rap star and Tom Hanks scion Chet Haze. We will now remedy that. Below, a thorough review of all of Chet's wisdom shared on Twitter thus far this year. Absorb that shit.