Mystery Sex Affair Stuns UK Prime Minister's Office, Spurs Crisis Talk

Taylor Berman · 06/02/13 07:14PM

According to an intriguing but frustratingly vague report in the Daily Mail, UK Prime Minister David Cameron and his office at No. 10 Downing Street are in the midst of dealing with a sex scandal described by the Mail's sources as “stunn[ing],” “dynamite,” “a complete mess” and “of great personal distress to innocent parties.” But what's the scandal, and who exactly does it involve? No one who knows is saying, at least not publicly.

British Police Plan a 'Fightback' as Three More Die in Riots

Adrian Chen · 08/10/11 10:36AM

On the fourth night of England's riots, 10,000 police flooded London streets and the city remained mostly calm. But the riots spread to other cities, leaving three men dead in Birmingham. British Prime Minister David Cameron promised a "fightback" to squelch unrest.

Obama Slaps Balls with Prime Minister

Maureen O'Connor · 05/24/11 04:06PM

After time-traveling back to 2008 with the royal family, President Obama visited British Prime Minister David Cameron today. Mostly they hung out with British schoolboys, flicking the youths' tiny white balls to and fro. Obama and Cameron double-teamed the children before a live audience.

UK Election: What the Hell Happened?

Max Read · 05/07/10 03:05AM

Well, Great Britain ("America 1.0") finally held its election last night, and it looks like they'll wind up with a hung Parliament, which means Thomas Jane will be made Prime Minister. Just kidding! But seriously, who won?

UK Debate Winner: 'We Need to Grip It Very Hard'

Max Read · 04/29/10 10:45PM

What did our cousins in Britain do last night while eating their nightly meal of fish and chips? They watched the final pre-election debate between the leaders of the three major parties, of course! And guess who won?

Your Guide to England's Super-Exciting Election

Max Read · 04/15/10 12:23AM

Huzzah! America's Deadbeat Older Brother, the United Kingdom, is holding an election for Best Wizard! Or Prime Minister, or something. Who are the "Party Leaders" who might lead the UK? Is one of them Ringo? We know who Ringo is.

Multicultural Harmony Ends High-Profile Theft In London

Michael Weiss · 07/28/08 01:55PM

Bobo British Conservative leader David Cameron had his bike stolen in London last Wednesday. Today it was returned to him courtesy, writes the Sunday Mirror, of "Ernest Theophile and his Rasta friend 'KJ', who used their street contacts to trace the bike." Gone are the days of disappearing women of ill repute from jowly gentlemen's clubs. Everyone's home by 6 and shaking bottles of balsamic vinagrette in this new, smiling Tory party. Although it was Cameron who "joked" about implementing sharia law to hunt down and punish the dirty git what stole his precious bike.