As you watch this poor pup go around and around in his dinghy, your heart, too, will spin circles. Do you take pity? He’s trapped on that tiny boat, and all that motion is surely wreaking havoc on his tummy. Do you laugh? Dumb dog! Or do you feel envy? Dinghy donuts are probably more fun than lots of things, such as watching YouTube videos of dumb dogs.
We've all been there. Where is there? The donut shop. What are we doing? Trying to find a good donut to munch. But, oh no—what if your shop is all out of Boston Cremes (the unanimous best donut of all the varieties)? You can be like this mom and forget your baby at the store to go find the right one.
Wooooo yeah. In Hugh Lofting's classic children's book Dr. Doolittle, there's an imaginary animal called a pushmi-pullyu. Shit yeah. It has two heads, one on either end of its body, and can't move because it's always pulling itself in two directions at once. Hell yeah. This is kind of like that, except instead of a weird goat thing, it's a VW Passat, and instead of standing in place, it's doing the most bitchin' donuts you've ever seen. Awwwww fuck yeah!
When a set of keys is handed to a valet, a certain level of trust is exchanged. But for these valets, "park my car" is mistaken for "make my car do donuts."
Click to viewBoomp3.com Gossip Girl star Taylor Momsen is just another celebrity to be added to the list of individuals copping with an irrational fear. While her fear isn’t as debilitating as egomaniac/talk show host Tyra Banks’ fear of dolphins or any other celebrities’ fear of running into Gary Busey, Momsen suffers from a fear of giant talking fried foods. A special screening of the sex comedy Sex Drive served as an intervention for Momsen so she could finally face her fear. Before descending down the red carpet, Momsen, who was breathing heavily, slowly approached the donut, but quickly turned tail as soon as the donut said, “Hola.” When asked for a comment, the giant donut said, “I scare a lot of people. It’s okay. Then again, a lot of people want to eat me. So, it evens itself out." [Photo Credit: Getty Images] *A Call To The Bullpen is a work of fiction. Although the pictures we use are most certainly real, Defamer does not purport that any of the incidents or quotations you see in this piece actually happened. Lighten up, people ... it's a joke.
The anchor of Fox's "Good Day New York" thinks this Rachael Ray/ Dunkin' Donuts controversy (recap: Celebuchef Ray wore a keffiyeh in an ad, right-wingers were outraged, the company pulled the ad) is so stupid. It is! When the story came up this morning, he acknowledged that he can't stand Rachael Ray and doesn't even care what this controversy is about. Cue co-anchor Jodi Applegate leaning over and hissing (audibly): "Dunkin Donuts is one of our sponsors." His backtracking is magical! Please, click to watch this moment of journalistic integrity in action.
Last time we checked in with the Banana Walnut donut at Balthazar, we cast on it an appreciative, almost saccharine, glaze. "Even if you're not a fan of donuts in general, you will be won over by the Balthazar banana variety," we claimed. But times have changed. FOR THE WORSE. When we sauntered up to Balthazar's marble counter this morning, the Banana Walnut donuts seemed somehow sadder and definitely smaller than before. In fact, they're tiny. Using the only measuring stick we have in the office (a Winston Light), you'll see they are laughably Lilliputian—and for $1.50, probably the most expensive bite you'll eat all day. The good news is that there are presumably fewer calories per donut.