And with only a few hundred write-in votes left to count, the AP calls it: Lisa Murkowski has finally defeated Joe Miller in Alaska's Senate race as a write-in candidate. Be nice to her now, Republicans: She's your Joe Lieberman.
Proposition 19, the California ballot measure that would have legalized marijuana possession, has been defeated, leading to literally dozens of bad weed jokes in headlines across the country. Poor Californians! Will they ever get a chance to try pot?
Gubernatorial candidate Jimmy McMillan, of the Rent Is 2 Damn High party, has lost to Democrat Andrew Cuomo. Oh, sure, Jimmy's too wacky to be Governor? Well, television cooking-person Sandra Lee is now the first lady of New York.
You lose the Delaware Senate race. Christine O'Donnell—the Delaware Republican Senate candidate who declared, "I am you"—lost to Democrat Chris Coons. Thank God this is the last time we'll ever see or hear about Christine O'Donnell, ever.
Well, Great Britain ("America 1.0") finally held its election last night, and it looks like they'll wind up with a hung Parliament, which means Thomas Jane will be made Prime Minister. Just kidding! But seriously, who won?