Even Ross Douthat came out swinging yesterday in favor of the slain cartoonists of Charlie Hebdo ("The Blasphemy We Need"). Since it is difficult to find even one square inch of common ground between right and left in American politics, this ought to have come as good news. Unfortunately, Douthat's Take is yet another of the many, many exercises in facile hypocrisy we've seen since yesterday.
In the weeks since Officer Daniel Pantaleo escaped indictment for killing Eric Garner, the NYPD and organizations that support it have targeted Bill de Blasio with airborne banners, mass back-turnings, and memes about his wife's choice of legwear. It's a horrible display of police fearmongering and entitlement—but it all pales in comparison to "Welcome to Fear City," a pamphlet law enforcement unions published four decades ago to attack the mayor they hated.
The fifth season of Fred Armisen's hipster sketch show Portlandia premieres tonight, and if you spend enough time reading about the comedian online, you'll be left with two impressions: First, that he's funny and charming. And second, that his charm and humor mask something of a reputation. For what exactly depends on whom you ask, but here are some adjectives that have been used to describe him over the years: "womanizer," "sociopath," "traumatizing," and, from Armisen himself, "terrible."
For the bulk of his tenure, New York City mayor Bill de Blasio has been dogged by rumors that he and his wife consume marijuana with some frequency. Yesterday, at a press conference in Brooklyn, he told a Daily Caller reporter that “I haven’t smoked marijuana since I was at NYU” and denied he ever smoked weed at Gracie Mansion, the official residence of the mayor. We’ve asked about these rumors ourselves. It’s worth highlighting, however, who exactly is spreading them: The mayor’s security detail and their colleagues in the New York City Police Department.
Patrick Lynch is the 51-year-old president of the Patrolmen’s Benevolent Association, the largest and most influential union of the New York City Police Department. You might recognize his name: Over the weekend, Lynch blamed Bill de Blasio for the Saturday deaths of two Brooklyn cops who were murdered by a lone gunman from Georgia. “That blood on the hands,” he said at a press conference, “starts on the steps of City Hall, in the office of the mayor.”
In 1776, the Phi Beta Kappa society was founded at the College of William and Mary for men in the "pursuit of liberal education and intellectual fellowship." Over the course of the next two centuries, Greek letter societies proliferated across the U.S. and morphed into the all-male butt-chugging clubs we know as fraternities today. This year in particular was big for frats, in that they were clearly identified as the primary arena for rape to take place on campus.
After shooting his girlfriend Saturday morning, 28-year-old Ismaaiyl Brinsley of Union City, Georgia traveled from Baltimore to New York and gunned down two NYPD officers, apparently in retaliation for recent police-related homicides. According to some commentators, however, Brinsley was only partially responsible for the murders, aided by accomplices Bill de Blasio and Barack Obama.
If you wanted to hear both sides of the argument about race relations in America last night, you might have made your way down to City Hall in New York, where pro-NYPD and anti-racism demonstrators yelled at each other across barricades. "You're a fucking racist," one side screamed. "You're a fucking moron," the other side screamed back.
Patrick Lynch, chairman of the Patrolmen's Benevolent Association and head spokesbaby for the inconsolable id of the NYPD, gave a private speech to his union last week. Bill de Blasio "is not running the city of New York," he said in response to a series of perceived slights from City Hall. "He thinks he's running a fucking revolution." The raging toddlers in attendance howled and smacked their tiny palms together in approval.
If a movie is not going to show us something new, it should at least show us something different. Below are some examples, for better and certainly for worse, of some weird shit I noticed in some of my favorite and least favorite movies of 2014. (Warning: There are, I guess, spoilers below. Also, in addition to that cartoon boob is one one human boob.) Please feel free to share some of your favorite weird moments in the comments below.
Even when I was a believer, God had virtually no place in my Christmas. Each December 25, I suffered through Catholic mass, feeling each second crawl by. I had things to do, presents to open, Christmas movies to rewatch, sisters to fight with, extended family to see, food to eat and eat and eat. I might have considered the Catholic implications of the holiday while in church, but only in the way that you consider the car in front of you that's moving too slowly.