JPMorgan has agreed to pay a settlement of $2.6 billion for charges related to the bank's failure to stop Bernie Madoff's Ponzi scheme. In the past two years, the bank has paid close to $30 billion in legal settlements. That number is smaller than JPMorgan's profits, so Jamie Dimon will never get fired.
The Masters of the Universe can be identified by their socks. Their millions of dollars, their vast power over commerce, and their socks, which must protrude four inches below the cuff of their suit pants when seated. Any greater length of sock exposure would indicate that the wearer was sitting with his legs crossed. The Masters of the Universe sit with both feet on the floor. These are the alpha dogs.
Recently, J.P Morgan CEO Jamie Dimon traveled to Washington DC to explain his company's massive losses to the Senate banking committee. Problem is a lot of those guys are getting campaign donations from J.P. Morgan. On tonight's Daily Show, Jon Stewart broke it all down.
Performing God's work is tough, and should be rewarded accordingly. So it's no surprise that investment banking executives are still bitching and moaning about a looming Federal Deposit Insurance Corp "clawback provision" that would give the government the right to take back up to two years of executives' pay if their banks fail and they ruin the global economy again. It's obviously The Poors' fault for being poor and and stupid and for losing their money, not the guys who are in charge of it.
Who's the last remaining initial member of President Obama's core economic team? The one people really don't like, Treasury Secretary Tim Geithner. But this job and his term as president of the New York Fed immediately proceeding it are exhausting him. It's backbreaking work, hoisting that money-launching cannon aimed at bankers all day. He's ready to quit.
Some former clients have filed a class action lawsuit against JPMorgan saying their bests interests weren't taken into account as the financial world first started to collapse in 2007 and, shockingly, that the bank actually profited $1.9 billion from the demise of London-based investment vehicle Sigma while the clients lost nearly $500 million in assets that JPMorgan didn't pull out. Oh the nerve of these not-as-rich-as-they-used-to-be people!