If you've not seen George "Jason Alexander" Costanza lately, perhaps you don't know that television's most famous bald man is now trying to convince the world—via a toupee? Hair plugs? Something—that he in fact has a luscious head of brown hair. As a man who has not yet had a problem with hair loss, far be it from me to tell anyone how to deal with a retreating hairline. The line I'm more concerned with is the timeline.
• Kate Hudson was supposedly holding out hope that she and Alex Rodriguez would reunite one day soon. But it looks like it may be time for Kate to let the dream die. A-Rod's new flame is a "gorgeous blonde" who he met at a gym in Miami. [P6]
• In happier celebrity couple news—and after months of schmoopy public displays of affection—Katy Perry and Russell Brand are now engaged. Brand reportedly proposed while in vacation in India, a trip they decided to take after Perry expressed her love for "Indian culture while they were eating curry." [Us]
• An autopsy has been performed on Casey Johnson, the socialite and pharma heiress who was discovered dead on Monday. There weren't any signs of trauma, but more should be revealed when toxicology tests are completed. In the meantime, friends of Johnson report she went into a diabetic coma on several occasions over the past year, "spent the last months of her life in a suicidal drug haze," and had been living in squalor up until her death, since her family had cut her off. Speaking of the Johnson clan, they're planning to have a private funeral for Casey later this week. [TMZ, NYP, NYDN, People]
• In other Johnson news, she was dealing with a long list of legal problems when she died, including a lawsuit by Porsche (for failing to keep up with her car payments), and another suit by a nanny service (which claimed it was owed money). As for fame addict Tila Tequila, her alleged fiancée, she's been busy posting to Twitter, recounting the "haunting visions" she's been having of Johnson and how they "made such a lovely couple." [TMZ, NYP, Us]
Seinfeld was a revolutionary sitcom, so its reunion had to be equally brilliant. As witnessed on Curb Your Enthusiasm, the non-reunion reunion about the making of a reunion on a different show will make blood pour out of your ears.
It's a big birthday for Bruce Springsteen. The rock legend turns 60 today. Also celebrating: Jermaine Dupri is turning 37. Singer Julio Iglesias turns 66. Mickey Rooney is 89. Playwright George C. Wolfe is turning 55. Jason Alexander of Seinfeld fame is 50. Hedge fund manager Marc Lasry is turning 50, too. Ani DiFranco turns 39. Writer Joshua Foer is turning 27. Writer/blogger Ana Marie Cox is 37. And Yankees pitcher Joba Chamberlain turns 24 today.
• A&E has agreed to acquire Lifetime, which means it's not entirely out of the realm of synergistic possibility that Duane Chapman of Dog the Bounty Hunter will make a cameo on Project Runway sometime next season. Yay. [THR, NYT]
• The Daily News has dropped its restaurant critic, Danyelle Freeman, and doesn't appear to be making any plans to replace her. [P6, NYT]
• Another luxury magazine is coming! The Financial Times plans to bring its quarterly glossy, FT Wealth, to American shores this October. [Crain's]
• It's been nearly two years since Oprah announced plans to launch a cable channel, and the venture's been riddled with problems ever since. [LAT]
• Italian officials are now investigating Google for its "lack of transparency." Yes, the same Italy that's governed by a man named Silvio Berlusconi. [NYT]
• Larry David will be bringing the cast of Seinfeld together for a multi-episode appearance on the new season of Curb Your Enthusiasm. Which makes sense considering it's not like Jerry Seinfeld, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Jason Alexander, or Michael Richards have anything better to do, now do they? [EW, LAT]
• It was clear that Michael Wolff was a bad husband and a bad boss. But now it looks like he's a lousy son, too. Wolff is being sued by his poor 85-year-old mother-in-law for trying to evict her from her one-bedroom apartment so he could sell it and collect a profit. [P6]
• Chris Brown appeared in court yesterday and was charged with assault and making criminal threats. He faces four years in state prison if convicted. [NYP, Us]
• Marc Anthony touched the leg of a woman other than JLo, which means he was either "flirting with danger" or just being nice to a "longtime friend." [Star]
• Just another typical Friday: Amy Winehouse has been charged with assault for punching a fan last year. [Reuters]
Or a serial-killing Jackie Rogers Junior? To be honest, we have no idea what he was doing. But it was pretty awful—and in that sense, fit right in with this terrible CBS crime show we had no idea existed! Still, we're happy to see Ray Romano working. Or Joe Mantegna? We're so confused. Video after the jump. (Thanks to Lisanti Quarterly for the tip!)Click to view