What if I told you that mozzarella sticks never had to end? That for $10, you could eat for free (for $10) for the rest of your natural life? That there exists a spot in the space-time continuum in which it is always Friday? That there are free refills on all Slushes™ excluding Red Bull® branded items?
It was bad enough that Paul Ryan compulsively lied about his marathon time, but now comes word that, among recent vice-presidential candidates who ran marathons, Ryan is only the third fastest. John Edwards posted the fastest time at three hours and thirty minutes. Impressive, if not super surprising; you don't get to be as monstrously vain and awful as him without a masochistic workout regimen. The real surprise here, though – and the one sure to sting the most to Ryan – is the report that former Alaska Governor and current reality TV matriarch Sarah Palin ran a marathon in three hours and fifty-nine minutes, a full two minutes faster than Ryan's time.
Live-streaming? Boring. Live-Tweeting? Laaaame. Live-sketching is where it's at, kids! Christoph Niemann, who draws a fantastic column for The New York Times Magazine, just finished live-sketching the New York City Marathon as he ran it—meaning that he's both a more talented artist than you and in better shape. You can take a look back through his marker—and, for the last couple miles, paint—renditions at his Twitter accounts @AbstractSunday and @AbstractSunday1. Neimann didn't stop to do these drawings (though we bet he slowed down for the hard stuff)—we're told he was practicing for months to get the hang of sketching and running simultaneously. (We've been practicing for years and we can barely run, period, so we're in awe). [NYTM, @AbstractSunday]
Well, this is unfortunate! Here's a video of the final seconds of last weekend's Tokyo-Hakone relay marathon. Watch as—with less than 200 meters to go—longtime frontrunner Natsuki Terada makes an accidental wrong turn and loses the race. Ouch.
If you missed the Community marathon that NBC aired last night, we've totally got you covered. The bad news? The hilarious duo failed to get a laugh out of us in these cheesy, laugh-track-filled spots.