What happens if you take a gang of juiced-up, Chihuahua-loving mixed martial arts enthusiasts and start driving them around LA in a stretch Hummer? That's the premise of The Collective, the greatest reality show ever filmed.
A visit from Uncle Regis is always a happy occasion for the ladies of The View, but things turned uncharacteristically ugly when, in a discussion about their slim Daytime Emmy chances, Barbara Walters suggested that since "we're just so happy, and since we have"—gesturing to Whoopi Goldberg—"this one," their outlook was sunnier, presumably from the days when the presence of Star Jones and Rosie O'Donnell turned off voters. Veteran panelist Joy Behar didn't quite read between those lines, responding, "I'll turn on you Barbara! I'll turn on you. She has to be kidding. I'll trip you. What—Whoopi's here so now we're gonna win?!" After some frantic earpiece pleading from the Viewmaster, things eventually returned to normal; but staying true to her word, Behar later extended one stiffened leg as Walters wandered into the studio kitchen for her post-taping cup of tea, sending the 78-year-old broadcast legend flying face first into a countertop and Splenda packets flying, and punctuating this premeditated act of brutality with the abrupt, five-word kiss-off, "There's your Emmy chances, bitch." [The View]
CBS has seen the future (or at least the ratings) and its name is Kimbo Slice. Or maybe it's Regis Philbin. Or conceivably both, after a look at the weekend ratings that established both EliteXC Saturday Night Fights and Million Dollar Password as the network's summer programming to be reckoned with — nauseously, perhaps, and only after sizable narcotic consumption, but no doubt inevitably. Philbin strung together an audience from the 60 Minutes window preceding him Sunday evening, winning the night with nearly 11 million viewers. But bare-knuckle Mixed Martial Arts superstar Slice fared surprisingly well in an even more sepulchral Saturday-night slot, pulling an average of 4.3 million viewers nationally between 9 and 11 p.m.